10 things you shouldnt feel in your relationship

Relationships are tricky because they can either bring out the best in you and bring you happiness or they can break you and make you sad. Yes, they require mutual effort so that they can work and these are the 10 things you should never feel when you’re in a relationship. 


A controlling partner can make you feel like they own you and being in a relationship shouldn’t be about that. 


Mutual respect is important in relationships and you should never feel disrespected by your partner at all. Even if you have arguments, you should still feel like you’re respected in your relationship. 


A healthy relationship is one where you can voice your opinions and thoughts without fear. A person who makes you feel like you should only say what they want to hear, when they want to hear it, is not right for you. 

Like you’re losing yourself

Sometimes when we’re in relationships, we tend to change who we really are in order to please our partners. Remember that you’re good enough and you don’t have to lose yourself. 

Like your life revolves around them

You had a life before your partner and you should still have one when you’re with them. This means that you should be able to spend time with other people (like your friends and family) without your partner making you feel bad about it. 

Like you’re in a one-sided relationship

Relationships work better if you and your partner are both willing to make it work. You should never feel like you’re in a one-sided relationship where you’re the only one who is willing to compromise. 

Like your feelings aren’t valid

Relationships come with a lot of feelings and emotions. A partner who cares about you will never make you feel like your feelings don’t matter. 

Like you’re always wrong 

Nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes. You should never find yourself feeling like everything that’s going wrong in your relationship is your fault.

That you owe them sex 

Being in a relationship doesn’t mean that your partner is entitled to have sex with you. Believe it or not, you can say no to sex and your partner has to ask for consent at all times. 

Like you’re not a priority 

I get that we all get busy at times, but your partner shouldn’t make you feel like they’re doing you a favour by being with you. It’s important that your partner makes time for you.

At the end of the day, every relationship is different and despite the rocky journey that it might be, you and your partner should always treat each other equally and with respect. It’s important for your mental and emotional health that you’re in a healthy relationship so if your relationship currently makes you feel any of the above things, then it’s time to consider whether it is right for you. 

Remember, if you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, a Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).