The Painful Reality: How To Deal With Cheating

Being cheated on is an awful experience and how you handle it can have an impact on your process of healing and moving forward. Cheating can lead to a lot of emotions like, doubt, confusion, and anxiety. Understanding and processing your feelings is an essential part of the process of healing from this type of hurt and betrayal. If both you and your partner want to take the necessary steps to move forward from the cheating, it can be done, but it’s going to require some effort and patience. Here are a few ways to deal with cheating:

Work through your feelings

You’ll likely experience different emotions as you process what happened, for example, it’s normal to feel disappointed and betrayed after an infidelity, so take a moment to recognize that this is ok. Getting over infidelity follows the usual stages of grief which are shock; denial; anger; bargaining; depression and eventually acceptance. Suppressing your emotions will not help but rather work through them by being gentle on yourself, allowing you to heal with time.

Don’t blame yourself

It’s too easy to blame yourself for what happened, but you’re not responsible for what your partner did. Dwelling on harsh self-criticism and self-blame delays the healing process; rather than finding fault within yourself or obsessing over what might have been or couldn’t have, remember that it is not your fault.

Don’t be afraid to reach out for help

If you want to move forward after being cheated on don’t be afraid to reach out to those around you for support and comfort. Being cheated on by your partner can make you feel alone and isolated, so it is good to surround yourself with people who care about you and your well-being like your friends and family. This will make your healing process a whole lot better.

Decide if want to rebuild trust

 When a partner is unfaithful it is a serious breach of your trust, and it is something that indicates that this person is not faithful. It is normal for people to make bad choices and if they are truly sorry and can make amends, it will show in their actions. Forgiveness can also play a huge role in having a better relationship but if you cannot trust them again, the relationship is doomed to fail.

Seek help from a professional

Dealing with cheating on your own is difficult enough and it can also be a challenge for you and your partner to work through this process on your own. Rather seek the help of a counsellor or therapist who deals with infidelity issues. A counsellor can help you work through your emotions, have more constructive conversations with both of you, and give you strategies to move forward.

Even after infidelity, if both parties do their work in the process of healing, relationships can end up being restored and stronger than before.

If you or a friend need advice or help, you can contact me here on Ask Choma, send me a Facebook Message, an  Instagram message, a  Twitter DM, or a WhatsApp Message (071 172 3657).