In love with someone you haven’t met

Falling for a guy online is pretty common these days. It starts with accepting a Facebook friend request, you inbox cell phone numbers and before you know it, you’re chatting on Whatsapp – almost daily. Pretty soon you find yourself talking to him on the phone into the wee hours of the morning whenever you can.

He gets you. You get him. The feelings you have for him are strong but is it really love?

How to find out if it is real?

Sure, it’s been a good couple months of getting to know each other. But have you guys actually met face-to-face? He may live in another city or even country, but you need to meet at some point or the other to see if you share the same chemistry online as you do offline. If he says he loves you and wants to be with you, then meeting each other face-to-face should be the next logical step. Someone who has excuses about meeting with you or worse – stands you up for a date you’ve planned together, is not someone you want to waste your time on.

Be wary if you suddenly become the one who is always initiating contact – making all the calls and sending messages. If he is not making the effort then this should be a red flag for you.

Don’t be blinded into believing that online chatting, sending each other sexy pics and endlessly longing for someone – is what a relationship should be about.

It can be very hard to care and love someone if you can’t see or spend time with them.

And who’s to say he isn’t chatting like this with other girls?

How to deal with your feelings?

Keep things in perspective. Think about the things you guys talk about. If it’s about pet names and talking sexy then it’s a crush and he probably just wants sex. If your conversations are more meaningful and intellectual, there is potential. Again, meeting each other face-to-face can only determine if the relationship can lead to something more. What happens if he doesn’’t want to chat to you anymore and starts ignoring you? Well, choma, don’t lose any tears or sleep over it. It’s only courtesy that he let he know he is no longer interested for whatever reason. If he can’t man up and at least do that, then he is not worthy of you.

Sometimes accepting and enjoying it for what it is will save you heartache later. Maybe he is just a flirty guy who likes to chat with you. Actions always speak louder than words on Watsapp. If a guy wants to be with you, he’d go the extra mile.

Have you fallen in love online?